Forums > Moaning forum > What-If Scaremongers

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I was reading a report in the local paper today about someone who lost control of a car, overturned it and smashed it into the front of a chippy.

Nasty, but it was shut and nobody was hurt. Story ends... no wait.

The remaining two thirds of the article was quotes from the owner, two people who (didn't work there at the time as it was shut) worked there and random customers.

What if I'd (unnecessarily) gone to work early. I'd have been squashed!

What if there were kids playing outside!

It's a terrible thing, I always go there for my chips (when it's shut) I might have been killed for a sausage.


What if a row of Faberge eggs had been lined up outside? What if Morrissey was playing a surprise gig in the road (we can only hope)?




Some Motorbikes. A Skoda. Sexy girlfriend. Large DVD collection. #humbled

Tim said...

What if Morrissey was playing a surprise gig in the road (we can only hope)?


If that was the case I'd have probably done it on purpose myself, it'd be a small price to pay! :twisted:

They have to fill the column inches. Sad but true.

It is on the same level as trying to make nothing in to something. Reading the Metro over someone's shoulder yesterday (joys of being tall) I belmed at a headline about the Beckham's maybe moving back to London which finished with "the capital holds is breath in anticipation" (roughly, can't remember it exactly).

Really? REALLY? Of the many things that could make me hold my breath in anticipation this is so far down the list I cannot even fathom the number.

Maybe we could ask the news to report important newsworthy items?


Now fueled by heavy oil...

Melrose, a few miles from us is full of old drunk people who can barely walk but mostly drive.

This past week an 81 year old man managed to reverse across the road at 90 degrees to it directional flow and pin two passers by to a local hotel wall. Both are critical having been moved to Edinburgh.

The story was in the local paper with about that amount of detail. Appeals for witnesses etc etc.

Joking aside kids walk up and down that road to and from school! The couple who were hit were only there as their son was in the local hospital having an operation.

I could have told them about being hit by a woman in a Discover mounting a curb in the same village many years ago whcih would have beefed up the article but would have taken space from "Our council are rubbish" articles that proliferate. :roll:


JL said...

It's a valid point from Gavin (a phrase I use rarely!)

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