Murci heading towards Bracknell this morning:

Driven by a youngish chap that looked quite nervous and waited for a *huge* gap before entering the roundabout.

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I think my neighbour misunderstood when I said 'I can't wait for the next 911'

Lovely

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You're a big man, but you're in bad shape. With me it's a full time job. Now behave yourself.

Mr Balotelli just blasted past us through Wilmslow in his tastefully wrapped Bentley. Something like this:

It is as horrible as you'd imagine.